Alphabet Series
by animefantomboy
Summary: A-Z oneshot collections of random ficlets revolving around the lives of Konoha citizens. AU included.
1. Artichoke

**Disclaimer:**

I do not own Naruto.

Random ficlets on the daily life of Konoha citizens.

Major AU, you have been warned.

 _artichoke: a variety of species of thistle cultivated as food_

"Sasuke, I'm back!" Naruto hollered as he entered the apartment he shared with his boyfriend of three years when he returned from work as a Councilman. He has been slowly working his way up the political ladder, determined to be the next Hokage and serve the people of Konoha City.

"Sasuke?" he repeated.

Sasuke Uchiha. His rival since _forever._

"You!" Naruto glared at the pale, black-haired boy in front of him.

"Hn"

"Don't ignore me, teme!"

"Shut up, dobe"

The moment Sasuke and Naruto set eyes on each other in Konoha Kindergarden, they butted heads and their sandpit squabble erupted into the epic fight on a preschool level with the both of them nursing injuries of their own.

Naruto hated how arrogant Sasuke was whereas Sasuke despised how obnoxiously loud the blonde is. Of course, it did not help that their mothers were constantly heaping praise on them.

"Kushina's son, Naruto is so energetic. He looks exactly like his dad. Oh, and he says that he wants to be the next Hokage, how cute"

"Mikoto's son, Sasuke is going to grow up to be a real heartbreaker one day. Such a handsome boy"

It was amazing how much damage two six years boys could do which was what their parents discovered and soon forced to accept over the years. From Konoha Kindergarden, to Konoha University, the two of them remained classmates where they fought like cats and dogs over everything, be it in their academic pursuits or sportswise.

Naruto and Sasuke bickered, taunted and fought at each other until they finally realized that years of rivalry had developed feelings of affection between the two. Naturally, it took Naruto's broken nose and Sasuke's eye black and blue and the both of them lying exhausted on the dojo's floor before they finally admitted it.

"Dobe" Sasuke greeted from the kitchen.

"Are _you_ cooking?" Naruto gasped at the sight of his boyfriend standing in front of the stove as his jaw dropped in astonishment.

"Hn"

Sasuke flipped his frying pan then glowered at the floor where a few artichoke hearts fell onto the ground. Before he could clean up the mess, a large pot of water boiled over, the flames of the stove sputtering as the water frothed over the pot. "Shit" as he hurriedly switched off the flame.

"Are those artichokes?" Naruto asked, bending down to examine the green gob on the floor. "Looks like Hulk's baby puked all over the floor" he teased.

Sasuke stiffened then huffed "Fine" as he stormed off to the bedroom he and Naruto shared.

"I was just joking" Naruto yelled at his retreating figure. Naruto shrugged when silence greeted him. He didn't expect Sasuke to blow up like that. Hell, they have thrown even scathing comments at each other before. He brushed it off as Sasuke just having one of his moods then resigned himself to clean up the mess in the kitchen.

"He doesn't even cook" he muttered as he lifted the pot to pour the water down the sink.

"Is that ramen" Naruto peered curiously into the starchy water before pulling a strand of the noodles out and into his mouth. "Yup, definitely ramen"

Naruto suddenly felt a pang of guilt stirring when the pot in his hands felt like it weighed a million tonnes. He remembered that Sasuke was still wearing his suit earlier so he must have left Uchiha Corporation early to cook for him.

"Sasuke" he called, entering their bedroom where Sasuke sat on their bed, arms crossed and glowering at him then turned his head away, pointedly looking at anywhere but him.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to insult you. I was kidding" Naruto held Sasuke's face in his hands and pushed it to face him. "Forgive me" he said with the Puppy Dog Eyes that he knew Sasuke couldn't resist.

Sasuke's eyes softened, "Dobe"

"Thanks for making me ramen. Eat with me?" as Naruto pulled him to his feet and back to the kitchen.

"So…why artichokes?" Naruto asked hesitantly, afraid that to break the fragile peace as he slurped the artichoke ramen. Frankly, they tasted kind of weird but hey, he's not about to tell Sasuke that, especially not now.

"They are good for you. I know about your disease" as Sasuke blurted out when he reached out and gingerly held his hand, "You don't have to be ashamed of it, we can both live with it without much difficulties"

"Whatever are you talking about? I'm not bloody sick!" Naruto frowned.

Sasuke smiled comfortingly as he patted the back of his hand gently. Naruto barely contained his expression of horror and shock. Sasuke had never smiled like that, ever!

"I understand that your desire to copulate will be reduced but it is alright. Intercourse is just another part of our relationship. It is enjoyable but I am not going to leave you just because of your reduced libido"

"Wait, hold on a minute" Naruto held up his hand as he tried to take in what his boyfriend was saying.

"Are-are you saying that I _can't get it up?"_ he asked disbelievingly.

"Well, yes because you have irritable bowel syndrome. And that is causing your reduced libido and your recent anxiety issues" Sasuke snapped in a 'obviously' tone

"Tsunade had already told me everything. Don't worry, I am not going to leave you just because we are going to be abstinent for a while"

"Sorry to disappoint you, but I am perfectly fine. Reduced libido? I'll show you reduced libido!"

Tsunade cackled maniacally the next day when she saw Sasuke limping and Naruto unusually smug as they entered a bar for a drink with the rest their friends who dubbed themselves the Konoha Twelve.

"I won the bet. You old geezer" she taunted Jiraiya who was nursing a drink of his own as they sat hidden in a corner of the bar.

"Yeah yeah. How would I know that the Uchiha brat is going to fall for such a transparent lie? But hime, what is going to happen now that you won a bet" he shot back amusingly.

Colour left her face when she recalled her notorious string of bad luck after winning a gamble. "Well, crap" she cursed.

"Another sake here!" Panicking thoughts entered her mind as she gulped down her cup of sake.

Author's Note:

Well, I certainly did not expect writing this but who am I to argue with my muse? I do hope that you all will enjoy this. Stay posted for the next one-shot. Reviews please! Thank you.

Written at 7:05 PM


	2. Balloon

**Disclaimer:**

I do not own Naruto.

Random ficlets on the daily life of Konoha citizens.

Major AU, you have been warned.

 _balloon: a flexible bag that can be inflated with a gas_

Sakura skipped cheerfully down the streets of Konoha, her short fingers gripping a balloon string tightly. Her bright red balloon bobbed in the air with every skip the four year old took.

When she saw the old peddler selling that red balloon, Sakura knew immediately that she had to have it. Incessant begging and large Puppy Dog Eyes later, her mother conceded with the condition that she had to play with the balloon outdoors.

"No playing your balloon in the shop, honey. The weather is really nice today so off you go! Have fun, sweetie"

"Kayyyy" Sakura replied in a singsong voice as she bounced out of her parents' shop.

"Where am I?" Sakura panicking, she sobbed as fat tears rolled down her cheeks. Big menacing looking trees surrounded her with the sound of animals howling in the dark woods. She could barely see anything with the only bright thing she could see was her red balloon stuck among the branches of the tall tree in front of her.

She was distracted by the food in the market stalls earlier and as she reached out her hand to accept some manju from a hawker, she had accidentally let go of the string. By the time she finished her treat and thanked the hawker, her balloon was already blown away by a slight breeze.

Sakura spotted a red blip in a distance and ran after it to get her balloon back. Her short legs struggling to keep up with the balloon as she panted heavily. She watched as her balloon floated into a fenced forest with the sign 'Training Ground 44' hung on the gates. She started sniffing as tears began to pool in her eyes, afraid that she was never getting her balloon back when she saw a small tear at the bottom of the fence.

Covered in smudges of dirt and littered in small scratches, Sakura made it through the makeshift hole as she caught sight of her balloon again. Slowed down by the humongous trees which blocked its way, she managed to catch up with it until her balloon got stuck in a tree.

Lost, tired and hungry, Sakura began wailing.

"Little girl, what are you doing here?" a voice called out to her together with the sound of rustled leaves.

"I was- 'hiccup'- looking for my balloon. And now it's there" Sakura cried, pointing at her balloon.

A shinobi shot past her in a blur then walked up the tree and retrieved her balloon. Sakura stopped crying at the sight of the shinobi walking up the tree trunk. She broke into a watery laugh as the shinobi placed the string back into her grubby hand, gently but firmly closing her fingers around it.

"Thank you shinobi-san" she looked gratefully at the shinobi when she realised that the shinobi-san is actually a female ANBU. Every child in Konoha, civilian or shinobi have heard tales of the elusive ANBU and could recognise one immediately. Even though she was clad in a standard ANBU uniform and face covered by a bone white mask with an owl drawn on it, Sakura could see her womanly figure.

'Wow. She's a girl and she's ANBU' thought Sakura in awe.

"C'mon, climb on my back. I'll get you back home"

Arms around the kunoichi's neck as they ran through the forest at high speed, Sakura asked "Kunoichi-san, what's your name?"

"Well, you can call me Owl"

"Owl-san, I'm Sakura!" she said delightedly. "You were really cool earlier" she added.

Owl laughed at that, Sakura could feel the vibrations of her laugh as she laid her head on her back.

"If you train hard as a shinobi, you can be like me too"

"Really? Then I'll train hard and be a great kunoichi like you too!" she announced.

"Here you are" Owl lowered herself to the ground so Sakura could climb off her back.

"Thank you, Owl-san" she piped up.

"Now, no more chasing balloons in the forest. Alright?" she said at which Sakura nodded immediately. A poof later, Owl Shunshin'd away leaving Sakura at her doorstep. Sakura stared bright-eyed at where Owl was earlier, 'I'm going to be a kunoishi. SHANNARO!" she told herself.

"Sakura, is that you? Where have you been all day? Your father and I have been worried sick about you" her mother reprimanded as Sakura walked through the door.

"Kaa-san, I am going to be a shinobi"

Author's Note:

So here is the 'B' instalment of my Alphabet Series. I hope that you all enjoyed chibi-Sakura as I did. Feel free to prompt me and give me suggestion on the next words I should use in this series. Reviews are most welcome!

P.S. My sister informed me that she did not like the previous chapter due to the fact that it was a slash. She also said that I should appeal to the mass readers by editing the chapter and cutting out the slash parts. So what do y'all think?

Written at 3:55 PM


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